


Abominable

by camichats



Series: Dictionary Prompts [48]
Category: Marvel
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-05
Updated: 2019-01-05
Packaged: 2019-10-05 03:08:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17316920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/camichats/pseuds/camichats
Summary: Tony and Bucky and Natasha came out about their relationship, so now Tony has to stop them from murdering the judgmental public.





	Abominable

"If one more person looks at me like I'm crazy, I'm going to kill someone," Natasha said, her dark tone largely hidden by her press smile. 

"Well you are dating me, so how sane can you really be," Tony mused. 

Bucky snorted. "Not th' time sweet thing. Nat, how 'bout you find someone and we'll kill 'em together that way only one person's dead instead'a two." 

"Hmm I think I like this plan--" 

"I don't," Tony interrupted. "Convincing people that we're happy together by killing someone? I wouldn't buy that, and neither will anyone else. Please keep all murderous intent to yourselves until the next supervillain shows up." 

"Why would we save it til them?" Bucky asked, and Natasha nodded. 

"You always tell us that we can't kill them, even though they break out six months later and we have to have the same fight over again. Only worse, because when they bust out of the raft they tend to blame you, and then you're in the hospital and we can't have sex for a month. I didn't sign up for two boyfriends just to not get laid on a regular basis." 

"If that's why you signed up, maybe you should convince Bucky to take a gander at good ole Captain America, cause I'm not getting any younger." 

Bucky made a disgusted noise. "Don't even think that again." He gave an exaggerated shiver. "That was horrific." 

"I have to agree," Nat said, nose wrinkled. "Steve is so straight laced he could be a sneaker. Besides, you with a blond?" She shook her head. "No offense kotyonok, but that would look terrible. You look much better with, hm, darker hair?" 

"Darker hair?" Tony repeated with a small smirk. "Like say, brown? Or dark red for women?" 

"Just a thought," she said lightly. 

"A very good thought," Bucky added. "I think you should stick to that formula for th' rest of your life. Just to make sure you're happy." 

Tony shook his head, smiling. "You're both ridiculous." He very carefully didn't ask where there murderous intentions had floated off to. That would be counterproductive, after all. 

**Author's Note:**

> I'm on tumblr [@cami-chats](http://cami-chats.tumblr.com)


End file.
